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So I was on my way home from work today and I had the window open since it's warmer out. Now, the biggest drawback to leaving your window open when you're driving is that you get to hear every other driver's shitty music playing at about eight thousand decibels. It sucks. And more often than not, the people who have their windows down and their shitty music up are white guys listening to rap. Quite amusing. And then if you have music of your own playing and they hear it, like if you're stopped at a traffic light next to them, they turn their shitty music up just to prove how dominant they are. I mean, I don't know about you guys, but I'm pretty impressed when some whigger turns his ghetto music up really loud. After all, not just any dumbass can blow all their money on an expensive stereo system and hit a button on their CD player to make their music louder. Oh wait, yes they can. It's just that most people don't go around blasting their music as loud as possible because they don't want to go deaf. That's one thing I've never understood about people, they think that in order to fully enjoy music, it has to be so loud that it damages your hearing and your brain starts pounding against the front of your skull from the vibrations. Don't get me wrong, if you don't really like being able to hear, that's cool, knock yourself out. Going deaf at a young age just isn't my thing. But at least have the courtesy to turn your shitty music down when I'm around to be bothered by it. I may be an asshole, but when I'm stopped at a traffic light, I have the courtesy to turn my music down because not everyone in the world loves Marylin Manson as much as I do. I know, hard to believe, but it's true.

So anyway, I'm driving home from work with the windows open, hearing various shitty music. I came to a stop light, so I turned my music down. All of a sudden, I heard the music coming from the car right next to mine. He had probably the loudest of all the music I heard coming from cars on the way home, and what was he playing, you ask? Weird Al Yankovic. Yep. I looked over at the guy in disbelief. Not only was he blasting Weird Al for all of Colonel Glenn Highway to hear, he was actually singing along. I laughed so hard I almost missed the light changing to green. The guy was probably in his late twenties and looked like a relatively normal guy, but here he was singing along with Weird Al at the top of his lungs for the whole world to hear.

Now, don't get me wrong, I used to listen to Weird Al. But then I hit puberty and realized what a dorky fuck he is. What adult in their right mind would be blasting and singing along to Weird Al in broad daylight? I mean why doesn't he just save himself the effort and attach a big sign to the top of his car that says "HEY EVERYBODY, I'M A FUCKIN DORK!" I understand having guilty pleasures. I have a couple that, if ever leaked, could totally ruin my sterling reputation, but I damn sure don't do anything like that in public. Jesus Christ. I mean, on the one hand you gotta admire the guy because he obviously doesn't give a fuck what people think of him. I mean you couldn't care what people think if you're singing along to that shit. Unless of course he's just such a big loser that it doesn't even matter anymore. Like those guys that get so tired of not getting laid that they just stop trying altogether and don't even approach women at all.

But then again, maybe he actually thinks it's cool to sing along to Weird Al in public. You never know. I'm sure he and his Dungeons & Dragons-playing friends do it all the time. It's so funny how some people just don't realize what fuckin losers they are. There are some things about me that many would consider very, very nerdy, but there's a big difference. I don't do nerdy shit in public. So many people do and they don't even realize that they're completely ruining any chance they would ever have of getting laid. Like those fat creepy guys with their Dragon Ball-Z t-shirts.

Or those fucking losers who spend all their money at the arcade playing Dance Dance Revolution. I never get tired of making fun of those dorks. I remember last summer, I went to an amusement park with my fiance, and in the food court they had some arcade games. There was a line of people waiting to play DDR, and even some people standing around cheering for the dorks who were playing. Why in the holy hell would you pay fifty bucks to get into an amusement park, only to play a fucking video game? I've never understood that. Just go to the mall dipshit, it's a lot cheaper. And why the hell would you pay money to play that fucking game anyway? What does it do? Prove that you're a loser? Discourage any females from wanting to have sex with you? Hell, you don't need to pay to do that, just stop bathing. It's cheaper and you'll at least have the smelly kids as friends. DDR freaks have no friends, except other DDR freaks, who don't really count because let's face it, they aren't really people.

To justify this retarded habit, a lot of people have told me that DDR is very addicting, as though that's an excuse for them becoming a total loser with no chance of ever getting laid. First of all, DDR is not addictive, crack is addictive, alcohol is addictive, nicotine is addictive. A video game is not addictive. If you can't pull yourself away from some stupid game, you have problems. And even if it was addictive, and that if you did it once, you could never stop, I still want to know why the hell you would even do it once. I mean, when I see DDR freaks going at it, I think to myself "Haha, look at that fag. I bet he's a virgin," but apparently some people look at DDR freaks going at it and say "Hey, I wanna look like a fag and never get laid again just like that guy, because having a bunch of ugly virgins clap for me when I do a level perfectly would be the highlight of my lonely existence." Fuckin losers. God I'm glad I'm not them.

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